When you have abusive parents, the world is a dark place

When you have abusive parents, the world is a dark place
What I can say to you is ……. I feel for you
Yes, the world is not worth living when you have abusive parents
Those who have loving parents would seem to be so different from you
It would seem that they come from a different world
Of course they come from a different world!
They view life differently
They are happy, optimistic, loving and kind
I have interacted with one who was kind, optimistic, caring and loving, but of course, I do not think he can ever understand what I went through.

There are different types of parental abuse
Some parents only verbally abuse their children
Some verbally and physically abuse their children
Some parents even sexually abuse their children!

If you are an abused Malay Muslim child just like me
You will find the Malays generally chastise abused children who abandon their abusive parents
My Malay relatives (mostly wealthy) are generally heartless and apathetic
They listened to my abusive parents who labelled me crazy and they treated me as if I am crazy too.
Even when I was troubled, I never sought their help regardless of their stature and wealth because they are simply apathetic and caustic!

As a Muslim
You have no choice but to seek Allah’s help
I turned to Allah for help and he never failed me!

Yes, I was not able to accept my taqdir so I berated and cursed Allah
Later, I felt guilty towards Allah and I realised that Allah is testing my Imaan
I had to accept my taqdir, I can’t curse Allah because I can feel and see His Love and Rahmah.

The fact that I was angry with my taqdir prove that I am just a human being
A human being who has feelings!
If I were not angry for being spat, cursed, kicked, slapped, punched and chased out of the house when I was under confinement, then there is something wrong with me!
My abusers are really amusing, you know
I screamed when they abused me
and they tell the whole world that I am crazy for screaming and wailing!

Even in this world, Allah has given me much relief and ease
Allah has rewarded me in this world regardless of the fact that I cursed and berated Him
I returned to Allah and Allah accepts me.

Remember, abusers never change!
Do not be naive and stupid!
Be careful when you deal with them!
Never trust your abusers!

Improve your relationship with Allah Subhana Wa Ta’ala!
Recite selawat to His Most Beloved Messenger, Rasulullah peace be Upon Him
Allah rewards me instantly whenever I recite selawat to His Most Beloved Messenger, Rasulullah peace be Upon Him

Try to live well in this world
Do not ever try to kill or cut yourself!
Prepare for the next world

Never entertain the thought that Allah is cruel to you!
I feel safe whenever I cite Allah’s name
I do not think Allah will put me in hell (in the next world/Afterlife) since I have gone through hell in this world!
So never think that Allah is Cruel to you as He is the Only ONE who can make you happy in this world!

Remember, you have no right to kill yourself!
Only Allah can decide when you should die!
Never try to commit suicide!
You have no right to take your life!
Your parents abused you but you cannot abuse yourself!

If your parents treat you like rubbish, it does not mean that Allah would treat you like rubbish as well!
Allah is your Creator!
He knows that you would be abused by your parents even before you were born!
You can’t choose your parents but you can choose to accept your miserable taqdir!
You can choose to accept Allah’s taqdir and leave everything to Allah.
Let Allah deal with your abusers, in this world or the next
Let Him decide!
You just need to learn to live well
In order to live well, you have no choice but to trust Allah!

Ignore apathetic, holier than thou, judgmental preachers
They are not Allah’s spokesmen!
They are not blessed by Allah since they are so heartless and caustic!

You can’t choose your parents but you can choose to live well by loving Allah!
If you can’t love Allah then try to open His Holy Book, the Noble Quran
Recite the entire Quran, you will find that your anger towards Allah turn into love.
Once, I felt much anger towards Allah so I took the Quran and recited the whole Quran 8 times within the span of four months.
The outcome, my anger towards Allah Subhana Wa Ta’ala dissipated.
Al Quran is the cure for your anger and hatred towards Allah Subhana Wa Ta’ala.
You have no choice but to love Allah in order to live well in His world!

Rabbanaa Aa tinaa fid dunya hasanah wa fil aakhirati hasanah wa Qinaa ‘azaabannaar.


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